Gala Darling shares some insight on radical self love:

15 02 2010

One of the wonderful community members for the Dear Self: I Do project linked me to this wonderful post by Gala Darling giving us all some inspiration for radical self love.

There are some brilliant suggestions here in amongst all the love hearts and pink glitter, suggestions that extend well beyond ‘pamper yourself’ and other well worn platitudes.  This list includes such gems as:

Clean out your closet.
In addition to getting rid of old junk, cleaning out closets or cupboards is therapeutic because at the same time, you’re clearing space in your life for new, better things.”

Letting go of physical clutter can be a great help in clearing out mental cobwebs too.

Celebrate the ways in which you have grown & changed.
Growth is good, change is wonderful, evolution is fantastic. It’s proof that we’re on a path, that we’re going somewhere, that we’re living out our story to its full potential. Bake yourself a cake or somethin’!”

I’m a big believer in celebration – possibly evidenced by the creating of a ceremonial situation in which to dedicate ourselves to our own self.  If we spent the same amount of energy celebrating our small victories instead of crucifying ourselves over every little thing we identify in which we’ve failed, imagine where you’d be on your journey? Anything is possible.

Overall that’s what I get from this particular post… that anything is possible. Love yourself, be yourself in the fullest expression you can imagine, then expand that a hundred times again.  We don’t know what we’re capable of, because we never give ourselves the opportunity to really explore, being willing to fail, fall flat and suffer the rejection and ridicule we fear.

Nine times out of ten that’s now how things play out anyway… and in all honesty even if they do, there’s a whole experience you have of the world that those doing the ridiculing and rejecting won’t ever know.  And here we are back to small victories.

All the biggest victories are made up of these tiny victories.  What are your tiny victories?


Dear Self: I Do – Perth 2010

14 02 2010

As a visionary I’ve been working toward this since November. Today it culminated and I am completely humbled and moved by it.

I’m so proud of Kat for her.organisation and making this happen – it really would have been impossible without her to step up, take a chance and throw herself in the deep end. I love her willingness to try things out, to fall flat, to be involved in something she thinks is cool and put her own stamp on it.

I’m so proud of Sarah for leading the ceremony, and generating the space of it so *strongly*. Those participating couldn’t have helped but to get an experience of themselves that was completely new. I love that she spoke and that when she did, it was *real* and there was *power* that invited people to take this for themselves.

I’m so proud of everyone who participated, ,having the courage to stand up and make the vow you did today really took something. I hope that it was personal and meaningful to you, that you saw yourself in a whole new light. I hope you treasure your moment of promising as yours for yourself alone.

Thank you to everyone who contributed, be it conversation, propping up inspiration, pointing out potential problems, organising, spreading the word and everything else. It couldn’t have happened without you.

For me, I will never forget the sound of those voices swearing their vows together, I’ll never forget witnessing everyone sign their certificate. I’ll never forget speaking to life the poem that I wrote, with contributions from Daniel and Sarah – it was everything I imagined. I’ll never forget hearing the ceremony that I drafted and that was collaboratively edited being generated into spoken reality as people stood and listened, were part of it.

I’m humbled and inspired. I am deeply moved. I can see what is possible when people stand for themselves. There was so much love and sharing present – and that doesn’t surprise me out of an event that is a celebration of self and love/respect/care for self.

As Sarah said at the end, what you can give when your ‘tank’ runs full, is so much more than a constant giving from an empty tank. Anything is possible.

Details for Perth ‘Dear Self: I Do’ Event:

12 02 2010

Greetings all,

This Valentine’s Day give yourself some love. Promise to be your own best friend!

This is a free community event, a ceremony all about you – a self dedication. Take your future and happiness into your own hands by making a formal commitment to yourself.

Event Details:

Date:                    Sunday, February 14, 2010

Time:                   11am for an 11:30am start

Location:           The shady area in front of the car park on South Perth Esplanade


The ceremony will be led by Sarah Parker, who was part of the inspiration for the project in the first place.  Readings will be performed by Jaunita during the ceremony.   In recognition for your having taken part in the ceremony we’ll provide you with your very own certificate, and a copy of the ceremony (electronic copies are available upon request).

We will be starting promptly at 11:30am, but feel free to turn up anytime from 11am onwards.  After the ceremony there will be a picnic – feel free to bring a plate!  We’ll be providing some bottled water, but we recommend you bring your own as well.

The ceremony can be anything you want it to be, and it’s completely up to you.  You can present yourself with some jewellery or something else as a token to mark the day, you can dress up or buy yourself some flowers – consider what would make the day special for you.  We’re available to discuss this with you between now and Sunday, feel free to give us a call or email us on the contact details below.

We’d love you to RSVP so we know how many people to expect, but we won’t be turning anyone away on the day either – even an sms on the morning will be gratefully received! We’re looking forward to seeing you and celebrating with you on Sunday.

Contact us:

Kat:  0417 930 305 or

Jaunita:  0439 354 992 or

Introducing Perth’s Celebrant: Sarah Parker

10 02 2010

I have a lot of passion, love, and laughter in my life and I want to empower people to have this for themselves. I am always conscious about  being the best person I can be in any given moment, and I have learnt to be accepting of mistakes when I fail. I love who and what I am, and my centredness is what I hope to share with you. I have been active in the Perth pagan community for some time, and have worked in different disciplines. I have created non-denominational safe spaces and facilitated discussions towards finding the true self. I want every person to experience the joy of learning their own amazingness, and I want to share this with you.

I sincerely believe that if we treated every part of ourselves with love, trust and honour, the world would be a better place. From a place of love and respect we can change the world. I want to leave this place better than when I arrived in it, and I invite you to join me in this journey!

Less than 1 Month to Go!

22 01 2010

And things are really starting to come together!  Perth and Brisbane are firing on all cylinders and we’ll be announcing event details for these locations soon!

Jaunita has been working hard on the ceremony with the assistance of those community members who have volunteered to officiate the self dedication events.

Also coming soon will be some introductions to key community members including our lovely celebrants – keep your eyes peeled!

Be Your Own Best Friend (and not your own worst enemy)

8 01 2009

This February 14th, 2010 the Dear Self: I Do project is offering you an opportunity to make a commitment to being your own best friend.

If you consider for a moment how you treat yourself, you may soon realise that you don’t treat your enemies as badly as you do yourself.  We are our own worst critic – and we listen to this critic like it speaks the truth.  This project is all about your engagement with yourself. It’s about giving your critic new perspective and allowing you to take responsibility for your own happiness and well-being.

The project aims to present a series of free self dedication events Australia wide for people to participate in.  Currently we’re working on events in Perth, Brisbane, Melbourne, Sydney and Canberra. We’ve selected Valentines Day, because in amongst the showering of love on others on that day, you should have some of that for yourself too!   As part of these events, you as a participant will be invited to make a commitment to yourself to be your own best friend.

You can dress up, down or as crazily as you like, you can buy yourself jewellery or a special memento, you can pop your own bottle of champagne – it’s completely up to you.  We’re providing you with the opportunity and a blank canvas so that your promise is meaningful to you.    Our lovely community of people are also on hand to help you out with ideas and any queries you may have.

The idea for the self dedication event series came from the idea of a ‘self wedding’ and has evolved from there.   More details and discussion will be forthcoming soon, as will an opportunity to register your interest in participating in the city of your choice!